Kabbalish

There's an old saying, that "truth is stranger than fiction". Some people find this untrue, that the ideas and situations the mind of man creates are infinitely more weird and wonderful than those things that occur in the natural world. Some people mistrust things taken from life, feeling that such art is inherently narcissistic and overly-confessionalist. A couple of people are wondering why I'm talking about that Will Ferrel movie where that British chick narrates his life.

Something happened a little bit ago that, I think, supports the saying. About a week ago, the FBI arrested dozens of prominent citizens in New Jersey in a massive corruption sting. Now I know, I know, "Boy, people getting arrested in New Jersey for corruption? In the great state of New Jersey? Nawh! Get outta here! *sarcastic eye-roll*" But its not really the situation that's so delightful, its the players and merchandise. When the news broke, the FBI stated that they'd arrested state legislators, numerous lawyers, three current town mayors... and rabbis. The Jewish kinds. Having rabbis arrested in a New Jersey corruption sting is kind of like arresting a half dozen imams in Salt Lake City for running a prostitution ring; unexpected, and a little bit confusing. If any religious figures were to be involved in shady dealings in the Garden State, you'd expect a couple of priests, a bishop or two, maybe a cardinal. But nope, instead it was 7 Syrian Jewish rabbis. Shabbat Shalom, indeed.

Wait wait wait. It gets better.

Apparently, these were no minor corruption charges. Not measely bribery for the great state of New Jersey, no! The accused politicians had been using the rabbis to launder money through various religious charity organizations. Alright, your standard cash moving with a Hasidic twist. Not bad, not bad. The mayors also accepted money from private interest groups to let fake developers gain access to expensive property rights. Ok, land ownership crimes are on the more intellectual bent, but they make sense, given the state of the economy and all. I'm still with you. The rabbis were also accused of generating illegal income by trafficking in black market kidneys stolen from Israeli donors, as well as selling large quantities of fake Gucci and Prada bags.

And with that, organized crime in New Jersey hits lightspeed and leaves the galaxy.

This is why the truth is stranger than fiction. This is why real life creates things a thousand times more interesting than the shit we come up with in our brains. I don't think anyone could have thought up a situation involving New Jersey rabbis laundering money, selling organs, and dealing in faux designer purses, all the while in cahoots with a group of corrupt, probably Italian political officials. Its ludicrous. Its hilarious. Its terrifying.

And its all real.

Lets move to Paris, shoot some heroin and fuck with the stars